Love is Pain
I use to feel loved. Now I feel unwanted. You use to want to be with me. Now you want to be away from me. I use to be happier than anything. Now I feel like I’m crying over someone that doesn’t want to be with me. People use to tell me love hurts and I never believed it. Now I understand. I sometimes wonder if he knows what he is doing by making me feel alone sad and hurt. It feels like my heart was stabbed. Ripped out. Stomped on. Then put back in just so I could live with this pain. I use to say he is worth all the fights he is worth this because how happy I am with him. But if it isn’t like that for him. Why should I put my self thru this. It is my heart he is playing with and I’m done with it being a game. I can’t take that he is slowly turning into nothing close to what I fell in love with. He is so absorbed in being cool and I know I’m past it. I was cool it was great for awhile but cool doesn’t get you happiness it gets you fake friends that back stab you. Sometimes I wish I could just grab him by the hand and show him how my life was and maybe that would change it. I loved how he was but if he keeps changing into what his friends want him to be I know he will lose me. But I dont think he really cares what happens to me. I think I’m fighting this battle solo and I’m running out of power and slowly dying. I want him. I want happiness but I can’t force him to love me. I guess I’m nothing anyone wants to be with. If he even listen to what I been thru or knew he may take a step back. I feel like it is Sean all over again and my heart can’t take that again
